Tag: wellness

Refilling My Cup

Hello, my name is Andrea, and I love to blog.

The things is, lately that’s been REALLY hard. You see, I’m emotionally in a really weird place right now. A difficult place. I’m in counseling, and I’m dealing with many difficult things. There are times I find myself exhausted, knowing I should write something here but barely able to get dinner on the table and veg out for the evening. It’s not always physical exhaustion, but emotional. I’m having a hard time, and that’s okay.

I’m spending most of my spare time right now consuming media as opposed to creating it, and that’s okay too. Sometimes we all need a reset.

The Emptiest of Cups

Last night I realized how empty my cup actually is right now. I have spent the last few weeks feeling ill on and off. Nothing serious: a headache and mild stomachache, then later allergies. Yesterday I had allergies so bad the post nasal drip caused indigestion and a sore throat. I also was suffering from a pretty bad bout of bursitis in my right shoulder that made many mundane tasks quite painful. (Seriously, try taking off a bra when you can’t put your arm behind your back without wincing.)

When I got home from work I put on my pajamas and made myself a (too big) bowl of maple brown sugar Cream of Wheat. It felt so good and warm on my throat and I turned on some Jim Gaffigan stand up on Netflix and I settled in to try to nap. What I should have done was turn off my phone and nap. I needed that time of restoration. But I didn’t. When a friend you haven’t spoken to much in a long time wants to chat, you gladly chat!

But later when a good friend was upset I found I simply was incapable of helping. Why?

My cup was empty. It was so empty it was dry and dusty at the bottom.

How did I get so empty?

I haven’t been making enough time for myself. To refill my cup. How can we help fill others’ cups if ours is empty? Do you remember what they tell you when you get the safety talk on an airplane? In case of oxygen depressurization put on YOUR OWN oxygen mask before helping others. Why is that so hard for me to remember?

I’m making it a point in the future to be better about not letting my cup get so darned empty!

Things I Plan to Do to Refill My Cup

Unplug sometimes. I don’t ever intend to shut off Facebook. But it’s okay sometimes to turn off chat in order to restore focus. I’m doing that today, in fact. It’s odd sometimes, without the constant exchange of day to day information, but I don’t *need* to be constantly communicating with someone just for the sake of not being alone. And sometimes that distraction makes it difficult to be as creative as I’d like.

Enjoy the silence. The TV is on so often in my apartment that sometimes I forget what silence is like. When I cook I often listen to podcasts to entertain me (and drown out the noises of my downstairs neighbors) but early in the morning, sipping my coffee, silence is so wonderful and restorative.

Take a relaxing shower. I’m often guilty of treating showers as something that’s only good for getting clean, but warm water cascading gently down the neck and back can have a truly meditative quality at times. And the best part of a relaxing shower is slowly drying off in the warm air without having to get dressed right away. I need more of that in my life, stat!

Sit in nature. I spend a lot of time outside walking or running, but I never make time to just SIT in nature and enjoy its many pleasures. I need to listen to the birds, hear the rustling of the leaves in the trees, watch the squirrels frolic bouncily through the woods, and photograph the flowers and beauty I see every day in mere passing.

How do you refill your cup? Let me know in the comments!

A Few of My Favorite Things

I’ve been in hardcore consumption mode lately, and my creativity is currently lacking. So for tonight I’m going to talk about some of my current favorite things.

Van’s Say Cheese Gluten Free Crackers

I have never liked Cheez-Its or Cheese Nips. They have always tasted sort or burnt or bitter to me. I also don’t have any sort of aversion to gluten. But I DO have an affinity for good deals, so when I saw a $1.50 off coupon for Van’s shelf stable products I figured I’d give them a try. I had a choice between the Say Cheese! crackers or fire roasted veggie crackers that looked a bit like Wheat Thins. Now I’m on my THIRD box of these crunchy, cheesy crackers and I have to keep them at work so I don’t eat them all right before bed. Yes, these gluten free crackers are binge-worthy!

Yogurt Masks

I was a very bad girl when I spent Memorial Day Weekend in Ocean City, NJ. I did not apply sunscreen and my skin is paying for it. My already parched skin began peeling and flaking in the most unattractive manner! A quick Google search revealed that the lactic acid in Greek yogurt is a moisturizing and naturally exfoliating skin treatment, and I always have Greek yogurt! I used full fat yogurt. It feels so cool and refreshing on your skin and leaves your skin moist and soft without irritating. It’s really helped my skin smooth out and slough off the dead skin.

Riverdale

Riverdale is a Netflix Original Series based (loosely) on the characters from the Archie Comics, but it watches like a Miss Marple novel: centered around a murder mystery. Dark and sultry without gratuitous sex or violence, the show keeps you guessing on just who is responsible for Jason’s violent murder by throwing curveballs towards characters you thought you’d figured out. It’s basically a soap opera with a much bigger budget, vastly better acting, and you feel like you’re actually getting somewhere in the story. Also, there’s no bad language, so it’s appropriate for teens without being so squeaky clean that they’d lose interest. The best/worst part? Everyone is so dang attractive. Seriously, everyone.

Gold Eyeshadow

I love me some shimmer. And gold is a neutral color, ladies! And it makes the green in my hazel eyes really pop. It’s flashy enough for evenings, but chill enough for most work environments. It will always match other gold accessories, and you can dab a little on your lipstick to change from matte to shimmer. 😉

My Amazing Friends

Every woman deserves friends as wonderful as mine: friends who have your back when you’re struggling and lift you up instead of putting you down. Friends who don’t ever judge you because they know that while your journey may be different than theirs, it’s just a hard, and you have each other to help along the way. Strong women who are beautiful inside and out, and who are as authentic as you are. I love you, girls! ❤

When It Rains, It Pours

Sometimes we have periods of time where things feel like they’re going well, and then there are times when everything feels like it’s piling on you like an avalanche. This week has felt a bit like the latter.

We had new neighbors move in downstairs on Friday. They had all the windows open and the front door open on a very windy evening, and the wind kept slamming the door shut violently, which shook the entire building. After the 5th or 6th SLAM I went downstairs and opened my door. I politely asked the man (and with some trepidation, as we have another neighbor who drinks too much and slams doors while screaming loudly occasionally) what was going on with the slamming? He introduced himself to me and said he was moving in and seemed confused as to why I seemed to care. I watched the wind try to close the door again and made a comment about how it was the wind making the door slam (as an older man used  a towel to prop it open) and went back upstairs, but now whenever I see him he looks at me like I’m a giant asshole. So now there’s tension with the new neighbor because I didn’t want my entire apartment to shake while I was trying to relax after work.

Monday was an incredibly emotional day for me, due to digging up some deep rooted emotional issues I’d long thought taken care of. They do that, you know. Like an old, uncomfortable pair of shoes you think you’ve tossed in the dumpster but you find, years later, stuck in the sliding mechanism of the guest room bureau. They turn up and throw a stick in your spokes.

Relax I was stopped at a light.
He really likes chicken and rice.

Wednesday my dog Bingley, my baby boy, my heart, my soul, fell ill suddenly. He was lethargic and refused all food. He just slept all day and when I took him out for a walk he was stiff and slow. He had a fever, and the shakes. I decided to see how he was in the morning. This morning we took him to the vet because he was still feverish and shaky. They gave him a pain injection, antibiotics, pepcid and subcutaneous fluids and tested him for Lyme. He’s much better but my wallet is much lighter. I hope he continues to improve. I don’t know what I’d do without my baby boy.

When I arrived home today I received two letters in the mail. One, my doctor’s office announcing my doctor’s retirement. I’ve had the same, incredible, amazing doctor longer than I’ve been married. It’s safe to say that I love him like an uncle. And now I have to try to find a doctor that I trust as much as I trust him.

The second letter was from my apartment complex. The letter states that I’m in violation of my lease for not having renters’ insurance. I’ve had continuous renters’ insurance since I moved in, EIGHT YEARS AGO. The letter states that if I do not comply they may evict me.  I was THREATENED WITH EVICTION for not giving them a copy of a piece of paper. Can we not be civil in this day and age? This is the very first notice I’ve received for this ‘violation’ and it threatens eviction? Even though it’s a form letter, it’s ridiculous.

I’m tired, people. I try so hard to be considerate of others, so it’s extra hard when people seem ignorant of my feelings. All I want is a place to live where I feel safe and I can relax. It feels like so much to ask these days – to have peace and feel respected.

If I hadn’t started meditating regularly first thing in the morning I’d be in tears right now.

Be kind to others, okay? Life’s too short to be an asshole.