I find myself feeling boredom a lot lately. Things bore me. Lots of people bore me. My therapist (yes I’m seeing a therapist again) says it’s okay for me to just take some time for myself to heal and adapt and adjust to my new single life. Logically I know she’s correct, but I can’t help but hear the whispers of guilt in my ear that says “you’re stagnant… you’re not DOING anything…”
In 2017 I had a very concrete goal. It took me a long time to build up enough internal courage to start working on that goal. It was a huge life change, leaving my marriage, and the strength it took was boosted mostly by adrenaline.
They say that change is only made when staying the same hurts more than changing. I feel in my blood that there is more change coming for me. I get a lot of people asking me when I’m going to write again, but I’m still fighting the depression that keeps me from doing the things I used to love. The fact that I’m here today says a lot about how far I’ve come.
The good news is I’m starting to get ideas for new blog entries. I’m contemplating a Frugal February meal plan. We shall see! Anyway, thought I’d actually publish something here for a change. I’m not dead: I’m becoming the butterfly.
6 thoughts on “The Faint Rumblings of Change”
You are doibg a great job. I think everyone looks forward to your next blog, your next adventure! You are that butterfly. Waiting for Spring. Its coming!
I knew you were not dead, SD! I am hybernating too, ugh! SAD up in here, every day! BUT, this too shall pass. Fricking January, amiright…….I love your frugal Feb idea, btw. Hang in, honey! I think of you from time to time and always hope for good things to come to you and your new life! Huggies! -SMama
Thanks, SparkMama! I am far from dead, but yeah, the SAD is beating me up, too. I miss you!
Hi Andrea – it’s so great to see a blog post from you! I’ve thought of you several times over the past few months, and hoped you were doing okay. 2018 was most definitely a challenging year, and I’m so sorry to hear of your struggle, but I totally understand, as my own divorce tested my strength on a daily basis. Looking forward to seeing the butterfly emerge! Hugs to you.
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Thanks, Brenda! The second half of this year has been trying for many other reasons too which I won’t go into but I’m finally feeling my creativity come back!